it's easier to bolt
04.20.2011 
In the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus asked his disciples to watch and pray three times. Three times, they snoozed.
I am reminded of how easy it is just to bolt. Staying present is hard work. And, frankly, I can’t do it all the time. I can’t do it very well. To me, this is the purpose of Lent: to become aware of my weakness and know that I desperately need the grace of God.
Monday evening I was busily cleaning out my closet (a chore I loathe), when Matt’s voice boomed from above: YOUR GROUP! It was like the voice from Heaven calling me out of my slumber. Quickly my eyes read the clock: 7:22 p.m. My group starts at 7:00. I spent the next 7 minutes agonizing over whether to drive the two miles to my group and interrupt them.
It’s one thing to zone out and forget a commitment. But this was my SECOND week to completely space and forget my listening group.
On Monday evenings, we gather to share what we are hearing from God. We receive one or two pages of insights and a few passages of Scripture for the coming week. Each of us shares what we see in the passage and how God is forming our souls through His Word.
I find it humorous that the passage with most punch for me this week was the one in which the disciples slept while Jesus suffered. Humorous because God gave me an object lesson in my own forgetfulness or lack of awareness. He reminded me of the difficulty in staying awake. He reminded me that I need Him.
In the end, I drove the distance over the speed limit. I rushed into the group. “Perfect timing,” someone said. They welcomed me like a community of grace would welcome a stray lamb.
I am praying to be more present this week and to remain awake as we await the resurrection celebration on Sunday. And I am applying GRACE when I slumber.
Even so, today I celebrate this stupefying fact:
God has set EVERYTHING right between him and me. Romans 10:10
Lent, Present to the Moment
Reader Comments (1)
I love this, Gigi! I also find it hard to stay present in the moment. This morning, as I was just waking up, my mind started to reel off all of the things I needed to do today - before I was even fully awake! I chose to stop the litany of to-dos and try to start my day thankful instead of in high gear. One way I am robbed of being present is by telling myself all of the other things I should be doing. I'm trying to change this. And, like you, I'm trying to give myself grace when I inevitably fail. (In other news, the feed is working.) Loved seeing you yesterday!